Monthly Archives: January 2015

Differences Between Men and Women #43 Bedspreads

bedspread

I want to visit another one of the many differences between men and women: bedspreads.  If you are a man, you may have never given your bedspread a second thought or even a first thought for that matter.  If you are a women, apparently you have devoted a lot of thoughts to your bedspread.  Google the word “bedspread” and you get 5,940,000 results, none of which originated with a man.

As a guy, I am vaguely aware that there is something that goes on top of the sheets when the bed is made and I refer to this “thing” as a bedspread.  Apparently there is a definition for a bedspread and it is “a decorative cloth used to cover a bed.”  So, to a guy, throwing several jerseys of your favorite sports team across the bed would seem to meet this definition and thus constitute a “bedspread.” My guess is that my wife would not agree with my interpretation.  

To complicate things further, consider that what is covering your bed may not technically be a “bedspread.”  Perhaps it is a quilt (a warm bed covering with all the squares made of padding enclosed between layers of fabric and kept in place by lines of decorative stitching), a duvet (a soft quilt as compared to a hard quilt I suppose – filled with down, feathers, or a something that is not down or feathers), a comforter (a warm quilt, although if the definition of quilt is a warm bed covering what is the difference between a quilt and a warm quilt?), a coverlet (a bedspread, typically less than floor-length – not sure I have ever covered my bed with something that went to the floor on both sides so I must have always had a coverlet), or simply a blanket (a large piece material used as a bed covering which sounds like it meets the definition of all of the others). If you are a guy, then blanket is probably the only word that you recognized in the preceding sentence.  If you are a gal, my guess is you can articulate the nuances between a duvet and a coverlet. 

To my recollection, the following words have never come out of my mouth, “Honey, I think it is time we got a new bedspread.”  I just tried to read that sentence out loud and I just cannot do it.  Another sentence that I have never uttered, “Sweetie, I just saw that there is a really good quilt show at the museum, let’s go.”  

To a woman, a new “bedspread” will bring a new look to the room, especially if it can be accessorized with new sheets, new pillow cases and perhaps, even new curtains.  It will be like a mini room makeover and she will feel energized for a while.  But then the look will become old and tired and she will want to do it all over again.  A guy on the other hand would continue to use that bedspread that went on that nifty race car bed he had growing up if not for the fact that it only fits a single bed.

We must all pick our battles in life and this one is not worth it.  So guys, the next time you wife says it is time for a new bedspread just smile and say, “I think I saw there is a quilt show at the museum, maybe that will give you some ideas, would you like to go?”

Friday Funny January 2, 2015 New Year’s Resolutions

free-new-years-eve-clip-art-1

Happy Friday!  Today brings a brand new year!  Happy 2015!  I want to wish you and yours a Happy New Year and hope that 2015 will be filled with happiness and blessings for you.  And just in case you have had difficulty making a New Year’s Resolution, here are some suggestions for you to choose from.

Enjoy!

I resolve to be more decisive, maybe.

I resolve to have a password other than “password.”

I resolve to conserve energy by spending more time laying on the couch.

I resolve not to text a family member while we are both in the same room.

I resolve to limit myself to seventeen e-mail addresses.

I resolve to stop sending e-mails to myself unless absolutely necessary.

I resolve to chat with my spouse live instead of on Facebook.

I resolve to not say, “LOL… LOL!” out loud when I hear something funny.

I resolve to balance my checkbook — on my nose.

I resolve to be an optimist, forget that, I don’t think I can keep it.

I resolve to watch more TV, if I am paying for 250 channels, then by golly I need to watch 250 channels.

I resolve to learn how to program the VCR I purchased in 1998.

I resolve to get ready for Y2K.

 I resolve to figure out where Waldo is.

Thought for the Week

Be at War with your Vices, at Peace with your Neighbours, and let every New-Year find you a better Man. ~Quoted in Benjamin Franklin’s 1755 Poor Richard’s Almanac, December (quoteinvestigator.com)