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Friday Funny November 19, 2021 Thanksgiving Puns

Happy Friday! Next week is Thanksgiving, so let me wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving Day and just in case you are in need of a few puns to have ready to share around the table, I am here to help.

Enjoy!

On Thanksgiving, I’m both grateful and gravy-ful.

This Thanksgiving, may your heart be as full as your plate.

Thanksgiving is totally my jam.

Thanksgiving, a day that really is much ado about stuffing.

Life just does not get any butter than this.

You know that I only have pies for you.

I have a crust on you.

Stuffing compares to you.

Let’s give ’em pumpkin’ to talk about.

Let’s get the gourd times rolling.

You know I’m all about that baste.

You think I’m done? Honey, you just ain’t seen stuffing yet.

Green bean casserole, pecan pie, sweet potatoes – when it’s Thanksgiving, there’s always more than just one side to the story.

Did you find this turkey recipe on Google, Google?

Stop, drop, and pass the rolls.

My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn’t quit cold turkey.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” ~ Albert Einstein

Friday Funny November 12, 2021 Amoeba Jokes

Happy Friday! Comedians are saying that it is getting harder every day to tell jokes because it seems not matter what one says, someone is offended. I think it is still safe to tell jokes about amoebas – at least until I hear from the APL (amoeba Protection League).

Enjoy!

Is it true that amoebas call their friends using cell phones?

If you crossed a ghost and an amoeba, would you get an amoeboo?

Is it true that the amoeba had difficulty in math class be it multiplied by dividing?

Did you hear about the amoeba who crossed the microscope to get to the other slide?

If an amoeba took its own picture would it be cell-fie?

An amoeba gets seated in a nice restaurant.  The waiter gives her a menu and says,  “Make sure to pay before you split.”

Would you call an amoeba that heats things up a microbe-wave?

One amoeba turns the amoeba next to hm and says, “You will always be a part of me.”

If a bacteria when travels from his home colony to another does she experience culture shock?

A paramecium and an amoeba are walking down the street. The amoeba asks “So, lacking any pseudopodia, how do you manage to get around? The paramecium replies “A cilia question I’ve never heard!”

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots.” ~ Steve Allen

Friday Funny November 5, 2021 Dino-jokes!

Happy Friday and Happy November! This week we are going way back in time and digging up some dinosaur jokes.

Enjoy!

Would you call an extinct animal that works in the rodeo a Bronco-Saurus?

Would you call a dinosaur with great dental hygiene habits a Flossiraptor?

Would you call a dinosaur in high heels a My-Feet-Are-Saurus?

Would you call a dinosaur with no eyes a Do-You-Think-He-Saw-Us?

Would you call a scared tyrannosaurus a Nervous-Rex?

Would you call a dinosaur eating a taco a Tyrannosaurus Mex?

Would you call a dinosaur who is a very poor driver a Tyrannosaurus Wrecks?

Would you call a dinosaur who does magic tricks a Tyrannosaurus Hex?

Would you call a “foodie” dinosaur a Connois-Saur?

Would you call a dinosaur who went into law enforcement a Tricera-Cop?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.” ~ Albert Camus