Monthly Archives: July 2025

Friday Funny August 1, 2025 Take Stock of These Jokes

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Happy Friday!  Happy August!  Let’s kick off the month with some stock market jokes.

Enjoy!

I’ve been feeling lonely so I purchased some stocks. It’s nice to have a little bit of company.

Last week I purchased stock in Bose Corporation.  It seems like a sound investment.

This week I sold my Nike stock.  It had a good run.

Today I sold my stock in Scott Tissue after it touched a new bottom.

Last year I purchased Coca Cola stock, but it fizzled.

Today I purchased Caterpillar stock, it inched up a bit.

Did you hear about the stock broker who got electrocuted when he shorted Tesla?

I recently made an investment in a skateboard company.  I think I can flip it.

I heard that Henry Winkler committed investment fraud.  It was a Fonzie scheme

I am considering selling investments in this blog, but I afraid that people will think it is a punzi scheme.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Markets can remain irrational longer than you can remain solvent.” ~ John Maynard Keynes

Friday Funny July 25, 2025 Jokes You Can Copy

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Happy Friday!  As we come to the end of another work week, let’s stop for a minute and ponder the ubiquitous office copier.

Enjoy!

Did you hear about the photocopier that went to see a therapist because it had a lot of unresolved image issues?

Did you hear about the photocopier who brought a ladder to work because it needed a higher resolution?

Did you hear about the technician that fell into the copier?  He was beside himself.

Did you know that photocopiers are terrible singers because they are toner-deaf ?

Did you hear about the copier salesman who dreamed about finding a totally new color of ink to sell? He woke up and realized it was all a pigment of his imagination!

Did you hear about the counterfeiters who were shopping for a brand-new copier because they needed one in mint condition.

Do you know how photocopier’s watch movies?  Paper-view

My photocopier is like a magician; it can make important documents disappear.

I tried putting my lunch on the photocopier at work, but all I got was a paper jam.

My HP printer died today.  It was like a Brother to me.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“The best way to enjoy your job is to imagine yourself without one.” ~ Oscar Wilde

Friday Funny July 18, 2025 A Basket Full of Fish Jokes

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Happy Friday!  This week I caught a load of fish jokes for you.

Enjoy!

Did you hear about the fish that crossed the ocean to get to the other tide?

Did you hear about the fisherman who started a podcast because he wanted to broadcast his reel thoughts?

Did you hear about the fish who was stuck in traffic because there were so many carpools?

Did you hear about the fishing rod that went to therapy because it had too much tension?

If you crossed a fish and an elephant, would you get swimming trunks?

Would you call a fish in a bowtie sofishticated?

I heard that fish always stay up to date by following the current.

I heard that a young fish’s favorite game is salmon says.

I heard that a fish’s favorite TV show is Whale of Fortune.

I heard about a fish who was a very successful consultant because he was great at scaling businesses.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.” ~ Steven Wright

Friday Funny July 11, 2025 Dog Days of Summer

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Happy Friday!  The recent weather feels like we are in the dog days of summer.  So, here are some dog jokes to kick off the weekend.

Enjoy!

Would you call a dog that never throws anything away, a hoarder collie?

Would you call a dog that licks electrical sockets, Sparky?

 I heard that the most boring type of dog is a dullmation.

How does a Japanese chihuahua say hello? “Konichihuahua.”

Last week I spotted an albino dalmatian, seemed like the least I could do for it.

My dog ate all my Scrabble tiles, so I took him to the vet.  No word yet.

Yesterday, I threw a ball for my dog.  I know that is a bit excessive, but he looked great in his tuxedo.

I once entered my dog in an ‘ugliest dog’ contest and I won first place, my dog came in third.

I went to the library and told the librarian that I was looking for a book called “Pavlov’s Dog and Schrödinger’s Cat”. She replied, “That rings a bell, but I’m not sure if it’s there or not”.

Whenever I take my dog down to the local pond, the ducks attack him. I guess it is my fault for choosing a pure bread dog.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“You can trust your dog to guard your house, but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.” ~ Lani Lynn Vale

Friday Funny July 4, 2025 Jokes With A Bang

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Happy Friday!  Happy 4th of July!  Hope you have a great weekend.  Here are some jokes to start the weekend off with a bang!

Enjoy!

I took an exam about fireworks.  I was afraid I might fail, but I passed with flying colors.

This year for the 4th of July I purchased a cherry tree and a firecracker.  I bought a Bing, bought a boom.

Have you seen the price of fireworks lately?  They have skyrocketed.

I once injured all of my fingers setting off 4th of July fireworks. Now my friends say that they can’t count on me.

Is it a sign that you have purchased quality fireworks if the guy running the store gives you a high three?

If you cross a firecracker and a ghost, do you get Bamboo?

I heard that pirate’s favorite firework is M-80.

Last year, my 4th of July firework party was a complete disaster.  I couldn’t figure it out.  They all worked great during my rehearsal on the 3rd.

When George Washington gave his cattle feed was it the fodder of our country?

If a patriot had dry skin would his use revo-lotion?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have.” ~ Harry Emerson Fosdick