This week brings us a new NFL season, so let’s kick it off with some jokes!

Enjoy!

I heard that the least favorite drink for football players is penal-tea.

I heard that Tom Brady can’t listen to music because he broke all the records.

I heard that the Bengals defensive players spent their offseason shopping at the tackle shop.

I heard that Dak Prescott tried to tell a joke to his receivers but it was over their heads.

Is it true that football centers wear hiking shoes?

Is it true that the player easiest target with the football is the wide receiver?

Did you hear about what happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during the game? He got called for ineligible retriever downfield.

Did you hear about the football punter who decided to marry his high school sweetheart because she was a fair catch?

What did the football player say to the flight attendant? “Put me in coach!”

My aim with this week\s post was to share some football jokes that made you laugh, that was my goal post.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“The man on top of the mountain didn’t fall there.” ~Vince Lombardi

Happy Friday! High school and college football is underway and this weekend brings the start of the NFL season, so let’s kick off the weekend with some football jokes.

Enjoy!

Did you know that football players cannot wear glasses because it is a contact sport?

I heard that a football payer’s favorite ice cream is any given sundae.

Did you hear about the octopus who was the player of the game because he had ten tackles?

I heard that football players tend to tackle their problems head on.

What did the football player say to the flight attendant?  “Put me in Coach!”

Did you hear about the football punter who deiced to marry his high school sweetheart because she was a fair catch?

I heard that a football player’s least favorite drink is penal-tea.

Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism?  The guy retained possession.

In 2019 the Bengals played the Patriots and the Bengals threw 4 interceptions, I think Paul Brown turned over in his grave.

Is the best offensive player on Miami, the player with the most all-porpoise yardage?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“There’s golf to be played and tennis to be served up and other things to be done out there besides worrying about a silly football game.” ~Sam Wyche following Bengals loss to Browns in 1991

You can find my latest episode of “Leonard Looks at Life” at the following link https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/

Happy Friday!  As we approach the end of September, the college football season is well under way.  If you do not have a favorite team, let me offer some interesting options.

Enjoy!

Anteaters of University of California/Irvine

Horned Frogs of Texas Christian University

Banana Slugs of the University of California/Santa Cruz

Boll Weevils of the University of Arkansas/Monticello

Black Flies of the College of the Atlantic

Claim Jumpers of Columbia College

Demon Deacons of Wake Forest

Dirtbags of Cal State Long Beach

Fighting Artichokes of Scottsdale Community College

Fighting Camels of Campbell University

Fighting Pickles of the North Carolina School of the Arts

Golden Flashes of Kent State University

Hatters of Stetson University

Hustlin’ Quakers of Earlham College

Ichabods of Washburn University 

Purple Aces of the University of Evansville

Salukis of Southern Illinois University

Shockers of Wichita State

Sycamores of Indiana State University

Zips of the University of Akron

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“If the college you visit has a bookstore filled with t-shirts rather than books, find another college.”~ Albert Mohler Jr.

Happy Friday!  This week kicks off another NFL season, so I thought I would throw out some football jokes this week.

Enjoy!

Is it true that football centers wear hiking shoes?

Did you hear about the small ghost who was asked to join the football team because they needed a little team spirit?

Is it true that every year the Miami Dolphins lead the league in all porpoise yardage?

I read about the NFL kicker who finally married his high school sweetheart, seems she was a pretty fair catch.

Is it true that NFL players do not wear glasses because it is a contact sport?

I heard that women prefer watching football games when at the hairdressers.
The coverage is the same but the highlights are better.

Is it true that centipedes are not allowed to play on bug football teams because it takes them too long to put their cleats on?

If you crossed a football player and the Invisible Man would you get a football game like no one has ever seen?

I was going to share a poem I wrote about the NFL but it has 32 offensive lines..

One of these days, I am going to make an edgy football joke on Facebook, that is my goal post.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.”~ Vince Lombardi