Tag Archives: sports

Friday Funny August 2, 2024 Olympic Jokes

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Happy Friday!  With the Olympics going on in Paris, seems like an appropriate time for some Olympic-themed jokes.

Enjoy!

I recently competed in the suntanning Olympics, I only got bronze.

I recently competed in the insomnia Olympics, you snooze, you lose.

I recently competed in seafood Olympics, I got the prawns medal.

If having low confidence and low self-esteem was an Olympic sport, I doubt I would get a medal.

My tryout for the Olympic diving team was a flop, but I made quite a splash with the judges.

Sadly, being a procrastinator prevented me going to the Olympics. For the Olympics one needs to be an amateurcrastinator.

If laziness was an Olympic sport, I would shoot for coming in fourth so I would not have to walk up to the podium.

Is it true that Olympic runners do not eat anything the day before they run because they fast?

Is it true that a gymnast’s favorite spice is somer-salts?

A gymnast walks into a bar, she received a two-point deduction and ruined her chance of a winning a medal.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“I Didn’t Set Out to Beat the World; I Just Set Out to Do My Absolute Best.”~ Al Oerter – four-time Olympic Champion in the discus throw

Friday Funny May 3, 2024 More Baseball Jokes

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Happy Friday!  It is May and the baseball season is in full swing.

Enjoy!

Is it true that the baseball player shut down his website because he was not getting any hits?

Is it true that old baseball players stay in contact with one another by touching base every once in a while.

Is it true that baseball players do not join unions because they don’t like to be called out on strikes?

If you crossed a baseball pitcher with a carpet would you get a throw rug?

I heard that third base is harder to steal than second base because of the short stop in between.

I heard that if a baseball player wants to bake a cake he uses oven mitts, bundt pans and batter.

Is it true that the sausage quit playing baseball because he was the wurst on his team?

Is it true that the best place for geologists to play baseball is in the miner leagues?

I was going to tell you a joke about a pop fly but it is over your head.

The best baseball jokes will leave you in stitches.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging.” ~ Hank Aaron