Category Archives: Friday Funny

Friday Funny January 10, 2025 No Jokes Like Snow Jokes

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Happy Friday! 2025 is off to a cold and snowy start in many places.  So, let’s chill out with some winter jokes.

Enjoy!

Did you know that Frosty’s favorite aunt is Aunt Arctica?

Did you know that the preferred Mexican dish for a snowman is a burrr-ito?

Would you a snowman with a six-pack an abdominal snowman?

Did you know that sleds are always discouraged because they are continuously on a downward slide?

I heard that the snowman broke up with his girlfriend because she was just too flaky.

It has been so cold that Starbucks is serving coffee on a stick.

It has been so cold that we had to cut the piano up for fire wood but we only got two chords.

It has been so cold even property taxes are frozen.

It has been so cold that when I tried to take the garbage out, it didn’t want to go.

I tried using my loyalty credit card to scrape ice from my windshield but I only got 10% off.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.” ~ Albert Camus

Friday Funny January 3, 2025 Short Jokes to Begin the Year

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Happy Friday! Welcome to 2025, here is wishing you all the best for the new year.

Enjoy!

If you get advice from a cow, would you call that beef tips?

Would you call a musician with problems a trebled man?

What do you call an obese psychic a four-chin teller?

Is it true that pediatricians are grumpy because they have little patients?

I heard that barbers are never late for work because they know all the short cuts.

If a frog’s car breaks down does he get it toad away?

If someone who does not like carbs would that make them lack-toast intolerant?

If I wrote you an apology using in dots and dashes, would that be Re-Morse code?

The other day I found glasses on my cell-phone, it seems it had lost its contacts.

I like elephants. Everything else is irrelephant.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go, they merely determine where you start.” ~ Nido Qubein

You can check out my podcast at the following link:

Friday Funny December 27, 2024 Jokes to Ring In 2025

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Happy Friday!  We are at the end of another year, so let’s ring in 2025 with a few jokes.

Enjoy!

If you sprinkle sugar on your pillow on New Year’s Eve will you start the year with sweet dreams?

This year, I plan on fixing breakfast at 11:50 on December. 31 so I can make a New Year’s toast.

Once I thought I got lost on New Year’s Eve, but then I found the Auld Lang sign.

Someone offered me a raisin on New Year’s Eve, but I already had a date.

Is a New Year’s resolution something that goes in one year and out the other?

I heard that Dr. Frankenstein’s New Year’s resolution was to make new friends.

I knew I guy who had a New Year’s Resolution to buy a cheap hairpiece for his bald spot. He said it was a small price toupee.

My resolution for 2025 is to lose the weight I put on last year. But in my defense, I had a lot on my plate.

I am making a resolution to get over my fear of hurdles, but it may take a leap of faith.

I am making a resolution to relearn how to throw a boomerang. Hopefully, it will come back to me.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” ~ C. S. Lewis

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If you enjoy the Friday Funny, check out my podcast at https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/

Friday Funny December 20, 2024 More Santa Jokes

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Happy Friday!  Christmas is less than a week away so it is time for some Santa jokes.

Enjoy!

If Kris Kringle takes a vacation, would that be a Santa pause?

I heard that Santa went to the podiatrist because he had mistletoes.

Is it true that reindeer decorate their antlers with horn-aments?

I heard that Santa Claus joined Instagram because he wanted online presents.

Did you know Santa Claus has trouble spelling because he thinks there’s No-L?

Did you know that Santa’s elves drive to work in minivans?

The reason that Santa comes down the chimney instead of through the door is because it soots him.

I read that Santa’s keeps his clothes clean by washing them with (Yule)Tide.

I heard that when Santa met Mrs. Claus for the first time, it was love at frost sight.

I read that Santa installed GPS on his sleigh because he doesn’t want to be a lost Claus.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.” ~ Robert Paul

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You can find my latest podcast at the following link – https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/episode/ghosts-of-christmas-past-249725566/

Friday Funny December 13, 2024 Christmas Tree Jokes

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Happy Friday!  Christmas is fast approaching, so it seemed like a good time for some Christmas Tree jokes.

Enjoy!

Did you hear about the Christmas tree that went to the barber because it needed a trim?

Is it true that a Christmas tree’s favorite candy is orna-mints?

I heard that Christmas trees are bad at knitting because they always drop their needles.

I heard that Christmas trees so fond of the past because the present’s beneath them.

Did you hear what the Christmas tree did after it’s bank closed? It started its own branch.

Did you know that young trees that want to learn to become Christmas trees go to elemen-tree school?

Did you hear about the Christmas tree that went to the dentist because it needed a root canal?

Did you hear about the soldier who snuck behind enemy lines disguised as a Christmas tree? He was a decorated veteran.

Would you call a Christmas tree that knows Kung Fu, Spruce Lee?

I put a string of popcorn on my Christmas tree.  I think it looks butter now.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Some Christmas tree ornaments do a lot more than glitter and glow, they represent a gift of love given a long time ago.” ~ Tom Baker

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You can find my latest podcast here:

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/episode/rethinking-rudolph-the-red-nosed-reindeer-247520104/

Friday Funny December 6, 2024 Candy Cane Jokes

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Happy Friday!  With Christmas fast approaching, it seemed like a like a good time to unwrap some candy cane jokes.

Enjoy!

Santa never has to worry about the state of his candy cane collection because  they are all in mint condition.

When a gingerbread man breaks his leg, does he use candy canes?

If a candy cane could talk, would he say what he mint?

I heard that the candy cane crossed the road to avoid getting licked.

If a candy cane was sad, would it be red, white, and blue?

If a dog ate to many candy canes would it have a peppermint bark?

Would you call a sharpened candy cane a spearmint?

Candy canes are kind of like relationships—sweet, with a few twists.

Would a candy cane’s favorite subject in school be Math-mint-ics?

Would a candy cane’s favorite types of fruit be candy-lopes and cle-mint-ines?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?” – Bob Hope

You can find my latest podcast at

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/episode/what-to-wear-245178273/

Friday Funny November 29, 2024 Leftover Jokes

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Happy Friday!  I hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving Day.  Now is the time for leftovers and shopping.  So, here are some leftover jokes.

Enjoy!

It seems like every year I find myself eating leftovers from Thanksgiving for weeks afterwards.  Not this year though, I’m quitting cold turkey.

I was planning on taking Thanksgiving leftovers home, alas my plans were foiled

Thanksgiving leftovers are always good, until they’re not.

The waitress asked me if I wanted a box for our leftovers. I said no but I’ll wrestle you for it.

Did you hear about the cheese that did not want to get sliced because it had grater plans?

You know baking puns are a piece of cake, but cooking puns are hard-boiled.

You might think cooking puns are rare, but they’re well-done in every way.

If you are making a salad, one needs romaine calm.

I heard about the baker who nervous because he had whisked everything.

Did you hear about the pie that went to the dentist because it needed a filling?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“We should certainly count our blessings, but we should also make our blessings count.” ~  Neal A. Maxwell

You can find my latest podcast here:

https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/episode/thanksgiving-242845759/

Friday Funny November 22, 2024 A Baker’s Dozen of Thanksgiving Jokes

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Happy Friday!  It is hard to believe that this is the Friday before Thanksgiving!  I want to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving and thank you for letting me bring you a few laughs.

Thanks to you, this blog has had more than 20,000 views this year!

Enjoy!

Did you hear about the cranberries that turned red because they saw the turkey dressing?

How many bakers does it take to make a pie? 3.14.

If turkeys had a prom would it be called the Butterball?

Would you call an especially attractive pilgrim a puri-ten?

Do sweet potatoes wear their yammies to bed?

Is it true that turkeys gobble because they never learned table manners?

Did you know that little pumpkins cross the road with the help of a crossing gourd?

Did you know that the preferred drinking glass for a turkey is a goblet?

Did you hear about the turkey that wanted to play baseball so that he could cover first baste?

If you are having a Friendsgiving would you invite a group of pal-grims?

Did you hear about the green beans that tried out to be in the Thanksgiving play? They landed the casse-role.

Last Thanksgiving a policeman pulled me over on my way home for exceeding the feed limit.

My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn’t quit cold turkey.

THOUGHT DOR THE WEEK

“When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord has done.”

~ Johnson Oatman, Jr.

If you enjoy the blog, and even if you don’t – jump over to the podcast “Leonard Looks at Life.” Here is a link to the newest episode: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-leonard-looks-at-life-126237165/episode/connecting-with-the-past-240188092/

Friday Funny November 15, 2024 Rustling Up Some Cowboy Jokes

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Happy Friday!  Hope you have had a good week.  I have rounded up some cowboy jokes to kick the weekend off.

Enjoy!

A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, “Sure, that’s 20 cows.”

A cowboy goes into a library wearing a paper suit and paper hat. He wasn’t there five minutes before he was arrested for rustling.

Did you hear about the new cowboy film called The Sun? It is set in the west.

Did you know that Canadian cowboys have sticky feet because of maple stirrups?

Did you hear about the great cowboy artist who could draw really fast?

Did you hear about the cowboy who would take hay to bed so he could feed his nightmare?

Do you know how to warm up a frozen cowboy? Yee thaw!

If a cowboy finds a horseshoe does that mean that his horse is walking around in his socks?

Would you call a retired cowboy de-ranged?

Would you a cowboy who worked at a bank, the loan arranger?

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” ~ Will Rogers

Friday Funny November 8, 2024 Jokes If You Are Bored

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Happy Friday!  Halloween and Election Day are behind us and it is three weeks until Thanksgiving.  Hopefully, this is not a boring time for you, but if it is, here are some jokes about being bored.

Enjoy!

I was so bored that I memorized six pages of a dictionary.  I learned next to nothing.

The other day I was bored and hit my flat screen tv with a hammer, it broke, obviously.  So, I took it to Best Buy to get it fixed, and the woman at the counter said they can’t fix hammers.

I read about some scientists who got so bored after watching the Earth spin for 24 hours that they just called it a day.

I’ve been bored recently so I decided to take up fencing. The neighbors said they will call the police unless I put it back.

I remember once that my brother and I got so bored, we started throwing spice jars at each other, then the thyme really flew.

Last week I was bored, so I decided it might be fun to swap around the labels on my wife’s spice rack. She hasn’t noticed yet, but mark my words, the thyme is cumin.

Do you know what a termite does when it gets bored? Pretty much anything to break up the mahogany.

Sometimes when I get bored, I see how many different watches I can strap onto my wrists. I have too much time on my hands.

Last week I went to a lecture about lamps. I thought it would be boring,  but it was very illuminating.

I am so boring person that someone stole my identity and then tried to give it back.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Life is never boring, but some people chose to be bored.” ~ Wayne Dyer