Every once in a great while I come across a headline that causes me to stop everything and read the article. This recently happened when I saw the following headline, “Gassy German Cows Blamed for Barn Explosion.” Inquiring minds want to know, so I read the story. It seems local German police say that 90 dairy cows were kept in a shed at a farm in Rasdorf. Apparently the flatulence and belching of 90 cows in a confined space can produce a large quantity of methane gas. Just add an errant static electric charge to this cow produced methane buildup and the result is “a detonation, a spurt of flame and a slightly damaged roof.” No humans were hurt; however, one unfortunate cow suffered light burns. Kind of provides a new meaning to the phrase, “Let’s Raise the Roof!”
For some unknown reason, I find cows rather amusing. So I will follow that hard hitting news story with some of my favorite cow jokes.
One farmer was discussing things with a fellow farmer and mentioned that he recently had to shoot one of his cows? “Was it mad?” asked the fellow farmer? The first farmer replied, “Well, it wasn’t very happy about it.”
A Cowboy and a Cow
One day a very devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.
Three weeks later, a cow walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes.
He took the precious book out of the cow’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, “It’s a miracle!”
“Not really,” said the cow. “Your name is written inside the cover.”
Ten Things I Learned About Life from a Cow
- Begin each day in a happy moo-d.
- Don’t forget to cow-nt your blessings every day.
- Cherish each day because we are not on this earth for heifer.
- Turn the udder cheek and moo-ve on.
- Seize every opportunity and milk it for all its worth!
- Don’t cry over spilled milk.
- Honor thy fodder and thy mother and all your udder relatives.
- Always let them know who’s the Bossy.
- Black and white is always in style.
- It is better to be seen then herd.
What do u call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef!!I enjoyed ur Cow Humor! ‘What does a cow with a hair lip say??Moooooff! Sent from my iPad”
What do you call a cow with two legs? – lean beef.
Hey, Leonard. It behoofs me to tell you that your humor mooves me.