Happy September!  Labor Day has come and gone.  The days are getting a little shorter, a little cooler and school is back in session.  Which means it is time once again to be reminded of old I am getting, It is time for the annual “Mindset List” that notes events that have shaped the incoming freshman class, the class of 2023.  The list has a new home this year with Marist College and the full list can be found at   https://www.marist.edu/mindset-list. Most of the incoming freshman this year were born in 2001 which right there makes me feel old, these kids were not even born in the same millennium that I was.  I took a tour through the list and here are my twenty favorite items.

Enjoy!

• Like Pearl Harbor for their grandparents, and the Kennedy assassination for their parents, 9/11 is an historical event. 
• Thumb, jump, and USB flash drives have always pushed floppy disks further into history.
• The primary use of a phone has always been to take pictures.
• The Tech Big Four–Apple, Facebook, Amazon and Google — are to them what the Big Three automakers were to their grandparents.
• They have outlived iTunes.
• The Mars Odyssey has always been checking out the water supply for their future visits to Mars.
• Snapchat has become their social media app of choice, thus relieving them of the dilemma of whether or not to friend Mom.    
• PayPal has always been an online option for purchasers.
• Segways have always been trying to revolutionize the way people move. 
• Apple iPods have always been nostalgic.
• Quarterback Troy Aikman has always called the plays live from the press booth.
• Except for when he celebrated Jeopardy’s 35th anniversary, Alex Trebek has never had a mustache.
• They have grown up with Big Data and ubiquitous algorithms that know what they want before they do.
• Most of them will rent, not buy, their textbooks. 
• Their grandparents’ classic comics have evolved into graphic novels.
• Pittsburgh’s Steelers and Pirates have never played at Three Rivers Stadium.
• Blackboards have never been dumb.
• Cal Ripken, Jr., has always been retired.
• Teams have always been engaged in an Amazing Race around the world.  
• Coke and Pepsi have always been competing in the sports hydration science marketplace.

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

“Children must be taught how to think, not what to think.” ~ Margaret Mead

Happy Friday!  Happy Labor Day Weekend! Hopefully you were able to get out and go somewhere over the summer for a little vacation break.  Travel often takes through a variety of places including some small towns.  How small?  I am glad you asked.

Enjoy!

Baskin-Robbins only has three ice cream flavors.

You had to step out of the city limits in order to change your mind.

The nickname for the city jail is amoeba because it only has one cell.

McDonalds only has one Golden Arch and the nearest one is 15 miles away.

Instead of a 7-11 they have a 3.5 – 5.5.

The New Year’s baby was born in April.

The “Welcome To” and “Thanks for Visiting “ signs are frnt and back of the same sign.

You have to go to the next town to find 2nd Street..

A “Night on the Town” only takes about ten minutes.

The Subway restaurant that serves foot-long sandwiches cannot fit within the city limits.

You do not bother using  signal turns because everyone already knows where you are going.

Big social events are scheduled around when the high school gym floor is being varnished.

You call a wrong number and the person who answers can give you the correct number for the person you are trying to call..

There is no point in high-school reunions because everyone knows what everyone else is doing anyway.

School gets canceled for state sporting events.

It was cool to date someone from a different high-school.

The golf course had only three holes.

Anyone you are looking for can be found at either the Dairy Queen or Wal-Mart.

Directions are given using the one ad only stop light as a reference.

Weekend excitement involves a trip to the grocery store.

Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.

The best burgers in town are at the four-lane bowling ally. 

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

The three horrors of modern life — talk without meaning, desire without love, work without satisfaction. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

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Happy Friday! Happy August!  Before summer completely slips away pause and enjoy a few jokes chosen especially for you.

Enjoy!!  

A woman had identical twins.  One of them was named ‘Amal’ and the other  was named ‘Juan.’  The father was excited and proud of both his sons; however, he only carried a picture of Juan with him to show to friends and family. One day a close friend mentioned that he would like to see a picture of Amal. The man responded, “they are identical twins. If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.”

I went into a pet shop and asked for twelve bees. The shopkeeper counted out thirteen and handed them over.  “You’ve given me one too many,” I said.  He replied, “Well, that one is a freebie.”

I went to the library the other day and asked if they had any books about paranoia. The librarian glanced around and whispered “They’re right behind you.”

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick instead. She still isn’t talking to me.

I got my wife a new refrigerator  for her birthday. Her face lit up when she opened it.

Have you ever noticed that, if  you look really closely, all mirrors look like eyeballs?

I misplaced a mood ring I have had since the 1970’s and I am not quite sure how I feel about that.

I saw a story on the evening news where a cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway. Police advised citizens to be on the lookout for a group of hardened criminals.

Would you call a monkey in a minefield a Baboom?

This woman went to see her doctor.  She appeared very worried stressed out. She tells the Doctor, “I don’t know what to do.  Take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What is WRONG with me??”  The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you one thing.  There is nothing wrong with your eyesight….”  

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK

The sooner I fall behind, the more time I have to catch up. ~Author Unknown

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