Friday Funny April 4, 2014 – Do-It-Yourself Scam


Happy Friday! Are you interested in making a little extra cash? Well here is a great tool, a do-it-yourself scam kit. Just check the appropriate boxes, send it to random email addresses, sit back and wait for the money to come in. It is guaranteed to work or double your money back (just remember it was free and two times zero is still zero!)




Dear Close Personal Friend Whom I Have Never Met,

Good day and compliments. No doubt this letter comes to you as a huge surprise, but I implore you to take the time to go through it carefully as the decision you make might just determine the fate of the universe as we know it.

Please allow me to introduce myself.
_____ I am the wife of a very important Nigerian Official who has an extremely large amount of cash that I need to move out of the country and just need someone to help me.
_____ I am a very trustworthy representative from your bank. There has been a problem with your account and it would be my extreme pleasure to assist you.
_____ I am the person responsible for distributing lottery winnings from an international lottery. In a remarkable stroke of luck, although you have never purchased a ticket in this lottery, you have won!
_____ I want to buy your car and pay you five times what it is worth, I just need you to ship it to Outer Mongolia.
_____ I am the marketing director for a cruise line and I want to give you a free cruise! This is such a great deal that I cannot even tell you the destination or the name of the cruise line.
_____ I want to give you a high-paying/low effort job with our international finance division. It is so hard to find good help these days, but the fact that I found your email address shows you are just the right person for this job!
_____ I am a resident of a small village on the other side of the world that has been destroyed by a tsunami. Although everything in sight was leveled, I was fortunate enough to find the only working computer in a fifty mile radius, but my internet router escaped unscathed.

In exchange, I am willing to provide to you:
_____10,000,000 Vietnamese Dong
_____10,000,000 Indonesian Rupia
_____10,000,000 Colombian Pesos
_____ a very nice four slice toaster
_____ a coupon for a Big Mac

It is of critical importance that this matter be handled as expeditiously as possible. All I need to process this is for you to:

_____wire $250 to me to show you are a trustworthy but gullible person.
_____a list of all your credit cards including account number and expiration date – don’t forget those three numbers on the back of the card.
_____ship your car to Outer Mongolia
_____send me your contact information including social security number, all bank account numbers and all PIN numbers.
_____ mail me the box tops from three Kellogg cereals and a check for $2.50.

I implore you to respond to me post-haste. If I did not think you were an extraordinary person who could help me, I would not have chosen your email address at random from all the email addresses out there. This will be worth your effort, I promise and I have never lied to you.

Yours Sincerely

_____Dr. (Mrs.) Obi Won
_____Mr. Richie Rich
_____Mr. B. Shot, Esq., Partner in Law Firm of Dewey, Cheatum & Howell

Thought for the Week
I like long walks, especially when they’re taken by people who annoy me. ~Fred Allen


1 thought on “Friday Funny April 4, 2014 – Do-It-Yourself Scam

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