Happy Friday! I certainly hope you do not suffer from paraskevidekatriaphobia. No, that is not the fear of parakeets; that is the fear of Friday the 13th. Here are a couple of jokes to get your day off to a lucky start.
IF IT WEREN’T FOR BAD LUCK…
A old sailor was out walking on the dock one day when he met a former ship mate of his. They had not seen each other for many years so they had much to talk about and many old memories to renew.
After some time, one said to the other, “if you don’t mind my saying so, you don’t look very good, you must have experienced some bad luck.”
“Yes,” the other one said, “I have. You see this peg leg? Well, one day I was out on deck and me leg got all tangled up in a loose line and it was so badly mangled that they had to take it off at the knee.”
His friend agreed that was bad luck. The other one continued, “You see I have a hook for a hand. One day I was out on deck when a shipmate of mine fell overboard. I leaned over as far as I could in an attempt to rescue him and as I extended my hand to him a shark took me hand off.”
“My you really did experience bad luck,” the other responded, “I see you have a patch over one eye, What happened to your eye?”
“Well, I was out on deck again one day and just as I looked up, a seagull that was flying over, unloaded, and got me right in the eye.”
“And that took your eye out?”
“No, that was me first day with the hook.”
BEEN THERE THROUGH THICK AND THIN
A woman’s husband had been in a very serious accident and had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she faithfully stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, he finally regained consciousness, as he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he said, “You know what? You have been with me all these years through the good times and the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side… You know what?”
“What dear?” She asked gently.
“I think you bring me bad luck.”
Thought for the Week
Luck is the by-product of busting your fanny. ~Don Sutton