Friday Funny December 16, 2016 How to Confuse Santa

Sanata and Sleigh

Happy Friday!  Are you stuck in the same old holiday routine?  How about shaking things up a little this year by trying to confuse the old guy in the red suit?  Here are some ideas you might use to throw Santa off his game. 

Enjoy!

Nail the Christmas Tree and everything else in the room to the ceiling.

Throw a surprise party for Santa when he comes down the chimney. Refuse to let him leave until everyone else arrives.

Build a moat around your Christmas Tree, put a few hungry alligators in it.

Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad and a note explaining that according to his BMI numbers he needs to shed about 150 pounds. 

Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a plate of brightly colored hard-boiled eggs.

While he’s in your house, sneak up to the roof and leave a speeding ticket on his sleigh. 

Leave him a note, explaining that you’ve gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants and feeding the dog.

Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home. 

Leave out a copy of your Christmas list with last-minute changes and corrections. 

Leave Santa a note, explaining that you’ve moved. Include a map with unclear and hard-to-read directions to your new house. 

Paint “hoof-prints” all over your face and clothes. While he’s in the house, go out on the roof. When he comes back up, act like you’ve been “trampled.” 

While he’s on the roof, yell up to Santa, asking if he’d mind adjusting your satellite dish. 

Thought for the Week

“There is no more dangerous or disgusting habit than that of celebrating Christmas before it comes, as I am doing in this article. It is the very essence of a festival that it breaks upon one brilliantly and abruptly, that at one moment the great day is not and the next moment the great day is.” ~ G. K. Chesterton

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