Friday Funny May 29, 2015 School Excuses


Now that we are past Memorial Day, many schools are wrapping up and anxious children are welcoming the coming of summer.  Teachers can be thankful too that they will get a break from dealing with excuses like the following.


  • Dear School: Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
  • Please excuse Dianne from being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
  • Please excuse Johnnie for being. It was his father’s fault.
  • Chris will not be in school because he has an acre in his side.
  • John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face.
  • Lillie was absent from school yesterday because she had a going over,
  • George was absent yesterday because he had a stomach.
  • Please excuse Amanda from school yesterday. She had perfect attendance last nine weeks. That’s really good so I let her stay home for a reward.
  • Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.
  • Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
  • Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it monday. We thought it was sunday. 
  • Sally won’t be in school a week from friday. We have to attend her funeral.
  • Please excuse Casey from school. It was Take Your Daughter to work day. I don’t have a job, so I made her stay home and do housework.
  • Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
  • My son is under the doctor’s care and should not take fizical ed. Please execute him.
  • Please excuse Joyce from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday she fell off a tree and misplaced her hip.
  • Pease excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels
  • Ralph was absent yesterday because he had a sore trout.
  • Please excuse Sara for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Thought for the Week

It is indeed ironic that we spend our school days yearning to graduate and our remaining days waxing nostalgic about our school days.  ~Isabel Waxman


3 thoughts on “Friday Funny May 29, 2015 School Excuses

  1. J.L.

    During my thirty years of teaching, I never saw anything such as the above. However, I did have one young fellow who told me that he had missed school to attend his grandfather’s funeral and that a family fight had erupted during the calling hours. The fight became so bad that the participants fell onto the coffin and knocked it over, thus spilling the deceased out of the coffin and onto the floor.
    As for Ms. Waxman, I assume she was aware that she was actually talking about two completely different aspects of school as she tried to be humorous.


  2. David Miller

    Fun to see ol Shiloh School again in the photo..brings back memories of the coal trucks dumping off coal in front for the boilers below, grabing a sample and getting in trouble for it……taking the lunch room trash down to the boiler room and watch it burn as the janitor chucked it in….milk for a nickel and froostie root beer was a dime….safety patrol…slopy joe lunches……and the best day of the school year…field day.



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