Happy Friday! Here are some Dad Joke’s for you to ponder as you mucnh on the leftover Halloween candy this weekend,
It seems like I only get sick on weekdays. I wonder if I have a weekend immune system.
If I ever find the doctor who messed up my limb replacement surgery, I think I will strangle him with my bear hands.
I heard that it is pretty easy to convince ladies not to eat Tide Pods, but a lot harder to deter gents.
Last week I found a wooden shoe in my toilet. It was clogged.
I once had a girl break up with me because of my obsession with pasta. It left me feeling cannelloni for a long time.
My boss was upset with me for downloading the entire Wikipedia. I said, “Wait! I can explain everything!”
I think I am obsessed with collecting vintage Beatles albums. I need Help.
I do not mean to brag, but I made six figures last year. I was also named worst employee at the toy factory.
I remember when I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Unfortunately, it turns out that identity theft is a crime.
When I took calculus, I had to sit between identical twins. I found it very difficult to differentiate between them.
THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK
“The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything. “~Edward John Phelps, 1889