Happy Friday and a Happy Mothers’ Day to all the Moms. If you can, be sure to let your Mother know you are thinking about her this weekend.
Mom’s recipe for iced coffee: 1. Have kids. 2. Make coffee. 3. Forget you made coffee. 4. Drink it cold.
A police recruit was asked during the exam, ‘What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?’ He said, ‘Call for backup.’
Silence is golden. Unless you have kids. Then silence is suspicious.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom on Mother’s Day? Because she left the phone off the hook.
I bought my mom a mug that says, “Happy Mother’s Day from the World’s Worst Son”. I forgot to mail it but I think she knows.
There is a very old legend that says if you take a shower and scream “Mom” three times, a nice lady appears with the towel you forgot.
My housekeeping style as a mom can best be described as “there appears to have been a struggle.”
Would call a mother cow that’s just given birth de-calf-inated?
Good moms let you lick the beaters after making brownies, great moms turn them off first.
Motherhood is like a fairy tale but in reverse. You begin in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after people.
THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK
“A mother understands what a child does not say.” —Jewish Proverb