I admit that there are a few things in life that irritate me, my wife would say there are a LOT of things that irritate me.  One of the things that I get irritated and impatient with is the person that tends to be in front of me at the hotel self-serve coffee bar.  I go to the coffee bar at the hotel bar for what, I think is the obvious reason – I would like a cup of coffee.  However, it seems like I always get a person in front of me who either thinks they are auditioning for a career as a barista ore believes that pouring a cup of coffee is some sort of abstract performance art.

My process consists of the following steps:

1. grab a cup
2. pour coffee
3. stir
4. grab a lid
5. get out of the way

Depending on how fast the coffee flows out of the decanter, this process can take as little as 5 seconds.

HOWEVER, I the person that inevitably is in front of me at the coffee bar usually goes through the following steps:

1. thoughtfully select a cup
2. thoughtfully examine all coffee decanters in view
3. thoughtfully examine all other items on the coffee bar
4. fill cup 3/8s full from one decanter
5. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
6. fill cup another 3/8s from another decanter
7. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
8. pick up a sugar packet, shake for 5 seconds, tear and deposit sugar in coffee
9. stir coffee
10. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
11. pick up another  sugar packet, shake for 5 seconds, tear and deposit sugar in coffee
12. stir coffee
13. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
14. add half and half to coffee
15. stir coffee
16. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
17. add honey to coffee
18. stir coffee
19. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
20. add a touch of cinnamon to coffee
21. stir coffee
22. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
23. add almond milk to coffee
24. stir coffee
25. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
26. pick up another  sugar packet, shake for 5 seconds, tear and deposit sugar in coffee
27. stir coffee
28. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
29. thoughtfully select a lid
30. put lid on while being certain to remain in the middle of the coffee bar
31. thoughtfully take a sip of coffee
32. slowly begin to walk away

While I watch this process takes place, I am certain that several minutes have elapsed and I am now more in need of my coffee than ever.  I approach the coffee bar and 5 seconds later I have my coffee and am on way.  I do notice as I walk away that the person who was in front of me has turned around and is heading back to the coffee bar with a thoughtful look on her face.